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Finding the Farm

7/16/2013

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PictureMy "Blueprints" of the Roof

The Close of 1997 
8/11/97
 NOTE: R&SW sent a totally unexpected check for $1000 on this date.  I wrote, “I was shocked…It….made me ask the question, ‘Here I am working 50-60 hours per week for 1/3 of this amount. Should I rely on God 100% to supply our needs while I put 100% of my time into ministry?”

9/8/97 “During the last approx. 4-5 weeks we have been given incredible amounts which total over $16,000 through gifts, and earnings! This is almost too hard to believe.”

12/15/97 “I admit…the past two years…have been a difficult time. Yet, also looking back, there was actually no good reason to be fearful or stressed. …God supplied our every need…God is absolutely trustworthy.”

The Beginning of 1998

Building or remodeling an old house and owning a piece of farm property had been our dream for a long time. Leaving Kenya we'd liquidated everything except the items we brought home in our suitcases. The cash from items we’d been given by our supporting church had been returned to the church’s mission account, but sales from our personal items had been deposited into our personal savings account. So, when Donna and I located the perfect piece of farm land only 9 miles from Jellico we purchased it with money from our savings.  There was no existing house on the property and I had no building experience, but being young and naïve, I thought I could build my own home. Donna thought I could do anything I said I could do, so when no one suggested to us that we couldn't build it, we started. 

I remember walking heel-to-toe across the Florence Avenue rooms estimating their sizes-- guessing my foot was approximately 12 inches. I would then ask Donna if she wanted our house's kitchen, for example, to be larger or smaller than the one at the Florence house. If she indicated she wanted something a little wider or longer I added a few steps until it felt right for her. I then estimated the size of our "kitchen-to-be" based on that. From there I drew ‘blueprints’ on a piece of notebook paper using a standard ruler. We came up with a design and dimensions we thought would suit us. Donna began feeding me pictures and ideas from magazines and house building books. These helped me come up with a drawing of what we wanted from a side view. 


Determining dimensions, numbers of doors and windows, and whether one wants a white or a blue bathroom hardly begins the matter of construction. On the fly I was to learn about the placement of load bearing walls, the depth of footers, the steps necessary to waterproof a wall below ground, plumbing, wiring, codes, etc. The tools which helped me along the way included a step-by-step book a friend had used in building their house, a wiring diagram workbook, and the advice of dozens of men who had experience with laying footers, framing, roofing, electrical, plumbing, etc. I learned quickly and from mistakes. Every step seemed to be agonizingly difficult, but many friends and neighbors help for a few hours or a few days as our notebook paper blueprint came to life. 

I had my family to help too. My sons, Daniel and Caleb, were 12 and 10 when we began. They worked like grown men. Sometimes it was so hot we could only go an hour before we had to rehydrate with slugs of fresh water from our spring. Hours were long too. One night the kids slept in the car after our Wednesday worship meeting while Donna held the light and I lay  flooring until daylight. It was so cold that night that ice formed under our feet while we worked. Though it sound like something from LIttle House on the Prarie,  it is true. 


It didn't take too long for me realized that I had bitten off more than I could chew, but there were no options. The rent on Florence Avenue was consuming our savings.  I was convinced I could build for $25 a square foot and get us into our house debt free. (As of 2013, the house is 98% complete. We’ve hosted somewhere between 3-4 thousand people in our home with many of them being overnight(s).  My sons know how to work hard and can build. Donna and I fondly remember the all-nighter in the freezing temps; the kids don’t remember sleeping in the car. We estimate the cost of our land and construction to be around $27-$28 a square foot. We did it without any debt.) Beyond the house and the good memories, I also have a special creek/pop in my right elbow which I've self-diagnosed as ‘hammer-elbow’.

During all of this my Mother was still suffering from severe and chronic pain. However,  two local doctors (FA and BW) were heroic in the extra measures they took to find her a helpful treatment. Her condition improved greatly under their care though she continued to struggle to some degree round the clock pain. At least, by this point, they were beginning to enable her to function and to sleep. I no longer needed to sleep in the chair by her bed, and she could watch the kids if we needed to step out to the store for a few minutes. 


Somehow we managed to get through 1998. I slept little, but soundly. Fatigue was ever present due to the busyness of  working full time for Dwane, building the house, while also attempting to start a church locally. The church planting effort was the most discouraging, but something in my heart would not release me from plodding on toward it—no matter that the price seemed to be escalating.


These are a few journal entries from 1998 illustrating the things I discussed above.

1/3/98 “First gift of the new year was $75 from BC…If….He (God) will be supplying all our needs through Hi-Tech,  I’ll inform our donors to discontinue, or at least I’ll remind them that their giving should only be as God prompts them.” 

5/25/98 “R&SW sold some stock and sent us all their profit! $604.27!” 6/9/98 “Someone paid our rent anonymously!” 

7/22/98  “I am tired and discouraged.  My work at HTR has yet to be effective this year.  I’ve had no placements (sales or new accounts) in 1998. My house is only at ground level, and we still have no church.  I wonder why I’m here sometimes.”


Picture
Our house with it's roof as it is today.

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DROP-DEAD DEADLINE

7/2/2013

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Recruiting was people-work and people were my specialty. So, my new position with Hi-Tech Resources should have been a breeze-- Ha! 

The people weren't the problem, the jargon and culture of IT (information technology) was the struggle. Understanding that in Kenya I'd used a Commodore 128 and 5" floppy discs explains where I was technologically. We'd only gotten a land-line phone about four years before arriving in Jellico! So, the many terms associated with the information systems world, compounded with the worlds of recruiting and business spun my head daily. The phone interviews I had to conduct with programmers, designers, project managers, engineers, and a range of other professionals tightened the knots in my stomach into knots. Happy to have work, I still dreaded each new day and rejoiced --exhaustedly-- when one ended.  

Dwane calmly assured me that it would all come together eventually and that if a professional could not explain to me, in lay terms, what they did, they weren't qualified to do their work. I took comfort in this. There was just one thing in which he could not offer assurance or comfort, and he admitted it.

He had operated a debt-free company and the funds he'd allotted for me and my 'learning curve' were only sufficient for three months. At the end of the three months, if there were no placements (meaning getting someone a job with a client of ours), then the whole thing would be over. Dwane plainly said, "Steve, I don't know if it can be done. It took me 18 months before I made my first placement, but I'm willing to try if you are."

I converted a corner in our bedroom in the attic into a "Hi-Tech" office. There was just enough room for a tiny desk and chair. My tools included internet, a laptop, a fax machine, a cell phone, and prayer. 

4/4/97  On many occasions God has provided in the most unusual and unexpected ways. This entry from early April is an example:  "Received an email from F.G. explaining how he and his wife had formed a Limited Partnership listing GoodSoil Ministries, inc. as the other partner. He would be the General Partner, be liable for any actions against the partnership and own only 10% of the partnership. In other words, GoodSoil would receive 90% of any yield."

He explained, “I was going to place my church into the position of receiving this money on an annual basis, sort of like a tithe, but after discussing this with my wife, and our praying about this, I was led to place your mission into this place.”

The end of the three month trial with Hi-Tech was the last day of June. I had worked hard, but not made my first placement. A couple of possibilities were in the works, but nothing was certain. Dwane and I were praying together and individually. Those knots of mine were worse than ever as I held my breath in hopes that a company in Colleyville, Texas or one in Knoxville, Tennessee might hire candidates I had presented to them. 

June 30th was what Dwane called the "Drop-Dead Deadline".  It no placements by me, or by him had been made then he'd have no choice but to discontinue the opportunity. He wanted it as badly as I, so we both struggled to keep our thoughts calmed and our hearts from leaping into our throats as he spoke to the CFO of the Texas company. It was roughly 4 p.m. EST and the CFO had called to discuss the AS-400 Programmer I'd presented to them and whom they'd interviewed. We'd reached the drop-dead deadline day.

6/30/97   Drop-dead deadline day.  WS the CFO of E-company called while I was interviewing a candidate for Levi Strauss Co.  WS and Dwane discussed several issues on the phone regarding the candidate I’d submitted for a requirement at E-company.  The call was 3-way so I was listening as they discussed details. The conversation wound to a conclusion and then.... WS accepted my candidate!  My first account had come exactly 3 months from when Dwane and I officially began together--to the very day.” 

I glanced at my watch immediately after WS accepted our candidate-- the time was just after 4 pm EST.  The sale/placement had come in the final hour of the final day and netted Hi-Tech Resources $10,000.00 which was double what Dwane had allotted  when he hired me. This ensured I’d have work for another 3-6 months. Praise the Lord for blessing us both!

For a few hours, my knots disappeared. Whew! the first half of 1997 was past.  It would prove, by comparison, to be the dull half.

Picture
Copy of the first placement check.
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UNEXPECTED

7/1/2013

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PictureThe Hi-Tech Team (Dwane -3rd from left; Me -2nd from left)

When you are on bottom, any good news is a boost, but it is even better when it is completely unexpected.


3/30/97
Received an email from someone from Harding (my college alma mater) named Dwane.  I looked him up in the yearbook. I vaguely recall him. He said he heard about our work through a mutual friend in Florida (Keith). Dwane had been a vocational missionary in the Pacific Northwest and received one of our newsletters from Keith. He emailed me asking to talk with me. Less than an hour after getting the email, I got a call from him. He wants to meet with me in Knoxville to talk. I hope he has some insights into how we can do better. I can use the advice.

4/1/97 “Today, I went to Knoxville to meet with Dwane.”…

NOTE: The next entry in my journal is long. This is the account in abbreviated form: 

I met Dwane in the lobby of a nice hotel he'd suggested. Immediately I felt very out of my comfort zone. I'm a country boy and a 'bush missionary', so these posh surroundings were intimidating. Dwane introduced himself telling me he had two young daughters and a wife and he asked about my family. I thought this was a good start and he didn't carry the same airs as our surroundings.

The conversation shifted at some point to business. I was anxious to learn from him about how he and his wife had worked at church planting and carried on a vocation in the Northwest, but his direction was different, and I recognized it quickly. The emphasis of this meeting was not at all what I'd expected. Dwane wasn't here to give me advice on missions; he had called this meeting in answer to another of my prayers --- he was offering me a job! 

Quickly, however, I was lost in a jungle of unfamiliar jargon. IT and IS were not "it" and "is", but abbreviations for something connected with computers. He spoke of "languages", "requirements", "platforms", "systems", and all sorts of things which didn't mean in this conversation what they'd meant in the English sentences I'd grown up with. I tried to follow, but honestly, I could not understand exactly what he was talking about, but I listened on. My missionary training came into play since for most of my early years in Kenya I'd been lost in conversations in which I did not have full mastery of the language. So, I grasped what I could.

What I could understand was that this man had his family as a priority, that he did what he did to honor God, that he was asking me to consider joining his company, and that he was a man who prayed. (Leading a prayer at the close of our meeting). I understood those and they were the important elements anyway. So, I took him up on his offer.

Specifically, he asked that over the next 2 weeks I listen to about 25 hours of VHS tapes related to his business. (Turns out he owned Hi-Tech Resources-- a small recruiting company for information technology professionals.)  I agreed. Then, he said, "Good. If you want to proceed after that, then we will start. In the meantime, I want to pay you $500 for your time listening to the tapes." Maybe it is a 'man-thing', but it just felt very good for someone to value me that much. I had not been paid that much money for my time in a very long while.  On the drive home I prayed, I praised, and....(this isn't a very 'man-thing')...I fought, but could not defeat, tears. It felt that good to be valued and it felt that good to realize how close God was to me and my prayers. 

A real job! We again had a glimmer of hope and were refreshed, but only briefly. There were 'catches' in the arrangement. Dwane's position had limited guarantees and tall hurdles. I had three months to accomplish what Dwane admitted had taken him a full eighteen months. Again, it was clear that only by God's help in answer to our prayers could the necessary requirements be provided. 

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Last Penny

6/30/2013

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Picture
A.H. Francke whose life of prayer and faith powerfully influenced George Muller
Picture
We all stand on the shoulders of those before us. I was standing on those of George Muller, who had stood on those of A.H. Francke. Both were bulwarks of faith in God as provider. You will see in these entries from 1997 how we needed those tall shoulders to continue to trust in God for our provisions and strength. As we continued to adjust to our surroundings and circumstances in Appalachia, we were under a great pressure, but Deuteronomy 8:1-6 informs us that God applies pressure to test the integrity of our hearts.  I did not understand this principle entering 1997 in the same way I would exiting it.

1/2/97 “Memory Verse: ‘Some trust in chariots, some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God’ Psalm 20:7”

2/1/97 “I am remembering the men and women of the past who were literally down to their last penny when God recued them. I’m not there yet so, I should just keep working and wait on Him.”

2/3/97 “O LORD, I’m going to take another $1500-$2000 from our savings today to pay our bills. Please, help me see and understand joblessness from your perspective.  I can only guess that this is a season of refinement-- an equipping for ministry. Jesus became poor—then he preached to the poor with powerful words and stories. Perhaps the same is needed for me, but it is really tough.

2/16/97  Received this letter from a friend who’d just finalized the adoption of a child.

            Steve,  This money is part of a thank offering for (name of child). Please, have no hesitation to use it as you need….   Brotherly love,   O.

The note included a check for $400.00.

2/28/97 “Sigh. I’m tired. My prayers are just repetitions from yesterday, and last week, and the month before. It isn’t that I doubt Him at all. I’m just weary from the duration of the wait—15 months of ups-n-downs….

Today’s hopes become tomorrow’s disappointments and I’d just as soon avoid the steep fall from elevated expectations.  I feel like a P.O.W. must.  I know we’ll win the war, and that help is on the way, but I’ve watched the skies and strained to hear a chopper’s wings "whop-whop-whop" so long, that it’s easier not to always be looking up. I can’t wait for it to be over, but until it is…it isn’t.

"LORD, the drought is difficult. Waiting is hard. I sure wish this were over. Meanwhile, I know what I should ask for—patience and help to endure. Help me endure, but also…..send relief. We need an income. Please, bless my work with growth, but LORD, be quick to respond to both endurance and income. Thank you.”

3/3/97 A $1000 gift from R&SW and an encouraging note! 

3/8/97 “Several times in the past 2 weeks the words in John 14:27 have come to me and on two occasions it was during prayer. ‘Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I do not give you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid.’ I have found comfort in these verses.”

3/14/97  My mother's health was a cause for concern and attention. Her body was in pain around the clock and the meds she took often had odd side effects. When she could rest at night, her body would sometimes twitch violently. For a time I slept in a chair placed at the side of her bed as a kind of 'bumper guard'. If a muscle spasm sent her too close to the edge, it would wake me and I could keep her from falling to the floor. 

Broken sleep combined with the drain of stress from searching for work have exhausted me. I went to the farm this morning, not to work, but to be alone with God and to think. As soon as I arrived I was overwhelmed with drowsiness so I napped. When I awoke, I immediately fell asleep again. The second time I awoke it was due to being startled by a knock on the body of the truck (I’d fallen asleep in the truck). The knock was a fallen walnut on the roof, but it caused me to become fully awake. I felt refreshed and alert. I believe the LORD knew I needed this rest.

After waking the second time, I read some of 1 and 2 Corinthians. 2 Corinthians was especially meaningful.  The thoughts that most affected me were 2 Corinthians 1:9b, 3:4-6, 4:7, 4:11, and 6:3-10.  Specifically, I was refreshed in being reminded from Paul's insightful teaching that sometimes when things are difficult it is to show us that there are matters larger than ourselves, and that we need God.  Sometimes, it seems it was for Paul’s good that hardships came, while at other times it was for his listener’s benefit that he suffered.

I also found in 2 Corinthians 6:3-10 some things I’ve recently struggled with.

Having read and considered these verses, I stepped out of my truck, walked a few feet, and prayed. Actually, I began praying aloud when it seemed that God –through my thoughts- began addressing what I was going to pray about!  He instructed me to, ‘Keep on, one day at a time, doing whatever He put before me to do that day."  

I was about to ask Him, “But what am I to do, and what about the future?” when the answer came, “Trust me.” It seems I’m to trust Him a day at a time. I’m to follow Him without an idea of where we’re headed. Sounds like Abram’s situation, or Moses’ (Not at all comparing myself to them, but comparing with their call to follow Him into an unknown future.).”

NOTE: During the end of March I bottomed out.  Africa had difficult days in its own ways—malaria, threats of violence, cultural clashes, government instability—but March in Appalachia holds its own room in my “Museum of Low Moments”. Though God had provided for us for months, it was a daily, grinding sort of thing. I never knew what was ahead of this week, or today (except for bills that I knew would be due). I had not learned to comfortably trust Him. (Biblically, this is known as “doubting”.)  My stomach stayed in a knot. In other words, “I worried.” This worry was a sign that I had not yet understood God.

Most employees arrive Monday morning and put in their forty hours till Friday. The boss pays them at the end of the week. What would the boss think if his employee took the check and with obvious relief sighed aloud, “Wonderful! I am so very thankful. I thought I might not be paid this week!”? If I were the boss, I’d get the idea that my employee doubted my honesty.

Most employees expect their employer will pay them. When pay checks are delivered, few worry if it will bounce. Such an attitude would actually reveal the employee’s distrust of his employer’s abilities or integrity.  In my case,  I was not yet trusting my employer—God. (You can look forward to 3/11/00 when I'll report evidence of growth in this area.)

After several weeks it was apparent that sign painting was not going to be the answer to our income needs. I was too slow and speedy equipment was so expensive that investing in it seemed too great a risk. At the same time, local evangelism was stagnant. Casual friendships were growing in number, but meaningful in-roads into the community were not. I saw the overwhelming community needs (spiritual and social), but had not found anyone open to the personal changes that community healing would require.  Almost daily I doubted the decision to move to Jellico, but some deep sense of having been chosen for this place/people would not let me walk away. This inner conviction held my feet in the fire. I believed that God wanted to do something significant for Appalachia, and He wanted us involved.

Looking back, during that month I was on the bottom, but God was not far away. He never is--especially when we are on the bottom, or squeezing our last penny. The next entry in my journal demonstrates the unimaginable way in which He lifted us up on tall shoulders.


"Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands. He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD. Your clothes did not wear out, and your feet did not swell during these forty years. Know then in your heart that as a man disciplines his son, so the LORD your God disciplines you." (Deut. 8: 2-5 NIV)
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Work, Work, Work?

6/19/2013

4 Comments

 
PictureLetter and $100 check received 12/96.
Labor is honorable. I enjoy working. In fact, my children sometimes ask me if I know how to play. Work IS play for me, but in the Fall of 1996 I wasn't having much fun. 

 9/16/96 “I’ve been delinquent in recording our gifts. We have received decreasing amounts each month. The past 2 months have been under $900 per month. It has pressed me to become more sober about my dependence upon God. I’ve been sent to my knees again in earnest. The result has been a greater and purer dependence upon God to provide our needs....I’ve tried—I mean I have really tried to produce an income through (MLM sales company) and also sign painting. The result has been a $0 net profit. God is my strength.”
9/17/96 “…blessed today with a $37 check from (MLM sales company), realized $2455 gain on some investments I made some months ago,…and a car lot asked me to come tomorrow and paint some more signs.”

9/96  " It took 9 hours in the hot summer sun, but I found and completed my first sign job.  I prayed with almost every stroke of the brush that I wouldn’t ruin this guy’s window.  I didn’t, and he paid me $75. I was so thankful. It felt good to actually produce something for our family. It has been a long time."  

9/27/96  “I got some work this week hanging a sign ($50). Also was offered work  painting trim at SS Family’s house.”

9/28/96 “SS Family gave us about $50 worth of beef!”

11/15/96  NOTE: I often noted my many thoughts in my journal entries. They ranged from the monetary to the heavenly. They bounced through in random order at times;  I merely noted them as they came. This reflective-thinking was part talking with God, part introspective, and part thinking aloud.  Below is a snippet from a more lengthy entry that illustrates the many varied thoughts and issues racing though my mind in November 1996.

“Today …Prioritize time with God…Follow God into the streets today. Paint my signs and listen. Observe the people—especially the poor. It may be that a mountain man will come by..…My children need me.  I need to give them time…The Word is our comfort—I must read it for reassurance and hope.”

12/2/96 “We are being carried by gifts. Without them, I can safely say we would not still be in Appalachia. I wonder how much longer we can remain unless they increase or unless our earnings increase. It is at present a difficult leg of the journey…doubts about the…decision to be here are much more regular and convincing and yet, somehow, the Lord continues to empower and enable us to put one foot ahead of the next.”

12/17/96 “God has been great. Over the 1996 year God has graciously given us almost $14,000.”

NOTE: Throughout the year God provided for our needs, but our ministry struggled.  The Greek family had joined us in Jellico, and two other families already living and serving in Jellico were meeting with us, but local converts were non-existent. We had tried meeting in our homes on Wednesdays and then at the local clinic waiting room on Sunday, but the key to Appalachian hearts still eluded us. Yet by God’s grace we were still in Jellico, and with His continued grace we would continue to reach out in the New Year, and  I would continue in search of  work to meet my family’s needs.


  The Sign Guy

Picture
My Business Card
The MLM business was not producing an income, and I felt the need to provide income for the family. It was still my belief that I would be in Appalachia as vocational missionary. I wanted to serve as an example to men, showing by my own life, of how a man ought provide for the financial needs of his family. So, I continued to look for a job or create one.  


Around this time my brother came from Texas for a visit. One afternoon he drove into town for a soda, but did not return until 3 hours later. It was only two blocks to town, so there was some concern about his safety until he parked the car and stepped out with a wide smile on his face. 


"Where have you been?" I asked, "Making money." He replied. 


I could not believe it, but he had managed to arrange a sign painting deal with a small car dealership. They'd paid him $500 to letter two large glass windows. I knew he'd made extra cash occasionally as a sign painter, but it had never occurred to me to try it. The $500 caught my attention. I became a sign painter.  


I had no experience, but my brother  gave me a few tips. With a day’s practice on my Suburban’s glass windows and $100 of paints and brushes I offered a prayer and went door to door (literally) looking for sign work on the streets of Jellico. It took about an hour to cover both of them. The next to last shop on the second street offered me a job.

I worked 9 hours. The sun pelted my face as it reflected off the concrete, and torched my head and neck from above, but I was so thankful to have work that I hardly noticed. By end of the day, I came home with a  small pay check of $75 for my efforts, but a large sense of accomplishment and invigorated hope for as much success tomorrow. 
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Steady Going

6/16/2013

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Having read the first installments of these posts, I asked a reader what he was thinking. He replied, "Well, the first ones were pretty exciting, but these last couple haven't been the same. Hurry up and get to the good part!" 

I must agree. The details in the past two accounts have not been very exciting-- interesting, but not exciting. Coincidentally, this is the point. The months after our move to Jellico were not exciting. They were difficult, depressing and drug along. Yes, we were supplied, and yes, God's provisions kept us energized, but much of those years, and much of our time since, has simply been survival. It hasn't been an exciting adventure as much as the sheer determination to get up and go at it again tomorrow. Sometimes missions/ministry is that way.

An earlier post refers to the notion of a "journey". This has been that--a sort of journey. Along the way, I suppose I have come to believe that our years on this trek have shared, if not the experiences, then the learnings of the journey through the wilderness described long ago and summarized  in Deuteronomy 8:2-7. 

    "Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and  to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not your would keep his commands. He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live by bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD. Your clothes did not wear out and your feet did not swell during those forty years. Know then that as a man disciplines his son, so the LORD your God disciplines you."

We haven't collected heavenly bread each morning, but daily provisions have arrived and often just one day at a time. Many times, their source has been one which appeared inexplicably. Our clothes have worn out, but our closets are full, and like many of you, we need to get rid of some. We have not hungered physically, but our budget has demanded that we enjoy simple foods when others have lived more expensively, though not any better. And the LORD has tested our hearts. The slow, long slog has driven us to the brink of despair; the stillness and questions about the future have circled our camp like Amelekite raiders and hissed fear and doubt into our hearts like fiery vipers. The character of our hearts has been tested every day, and in future posts I intend to share some of those moments with you. Some will remain between us and the LORD. The important point, however, is that throughout these 17 years, we have been treated generously, lovingly, and wisely-- as a man treats his son whom he loves.

If I were writing a novel, I might have been more dramatic, or delved into the description of a local personality, or sermonized, but drama just wasn't a major element of  the early years. Most of what we did came more from the quiet waters of a deep conviction that God had a purpose for us in Appalachia, than the shallow babbling brook of adventure.  Which, true as it is, does not mean that future posts won't startle, stun, shake, or sizzle because, they will. 

We kept going, and God was in it.  The 'good parts' are coming. So, you keep reading. 
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Winter/Spring/Summer 1996:  SURVIVAL

6/16/2013

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1/2/96 B & DW handed me a $600 check today. They said that after summarizing their year’s income, they had this as an excess.

A small payment of some things we’d left for sale in Kenya came today. $13.25

JM sent the name of a prayer partner.

1/3/96 Gift of pastries. Enough for 4 morning breakfasts from JR. His daughter R dropped them off as she drove through en route to college.

Received a letter from GKen saying He’d made a contribution to his church for us that would be sent out soon.


1/4/96 SS family gave us a table and 4 chairs for the dining room. They’re antique and very nice.

1/5/96  GKen’s gift arrived in mail today. $1000.

1/7/96 BW wants a copy of our newsletter.

1/10/96 JM sent $100 plus a list of 16 names of people who want our newsletter and will be praying for us!

1/12/96 Took Mom to Dr. -- NO CHARGE!!.

1/14/96 R & GS sent $50 and a card with encouragement. ME sent $10. LA, who we don’t remember having met, sent $50 and has chosen us as her ‘project’ for the year. She plans to send aid monthly.

1/25/96 “Found a penny on the road while walking.”

2/12/96 “JM sent $300. W&LS sent $250.”

3/12/96 “…the mail arrived. In it was a money order with a note, but no return address. The note read, ‘Steve, God prompted us to give this.’ The postmark was from Colorado Springs, Colorado. The money order was for $500. We don’t know anybody in Colorado Springs. We don’t even know anyone in Colorado!”

4/30/96 “Regina social club at Harding University sent gift of $500.” NA, the daughter of F&JA is in that club and suggested that they assist us. I had  known NA when she was an infant, but have not been in contact since. Only God could have imagined such a thing as this.

5/6/96 “I’ve been working very hard for several months now (Beginning in June of ‘94 preparing for our return to the US.). Since January my health has suffered, due I think, to stress. I’ve not cleared even one dime of net profit from all my work (Note: I was working to establish income through a multi-level-marketing program selling discounted telephone service.) …I keep telling myself it is just the cost of doing business….at any rate, I will continue to do my best to “work my fields” and look to the Lord of Harvests for a crop. Today, I spoke to the Lord for a long while about all of this.”

5/12/96 NOTE: It was amazing to us as we watched God provide through so many people and with such surprise and variety.  For example, we didn’t even know the person ‘GK’!

  • GK $100
  • K&SH $30
  • AC $25
  • T&GB $15
  • JM $50
  • LA $50
  • KM $200
  • CS $60


5/16/96 NOTE: Though seldom having excess at our disposal, at times during the journey, we enjoyed pleasures and privileges  typically reserved for the world’s wealthiest. As an example, For months D&BW paid for us to have a maid come once per month and spend a day cleaning. What a blessing from the Lord.

“Cleaning from D&BW-$81”

5/19/96 “Gift from E&FW. It was sent along with a note explaining that this was a special amount, but they intended to send $50 on a monthly basis…they gave $500…God has sent gifts of $500 almost monthly from unexpected sources.”

5/23/96 “I prayed for help and the thought I should pray for ‘singers’  I’m supposing that they will play a significant role in the progress of the Lord’s Body in Appalachia. It seems that Appalachians have historically been gifted in this way. Music is probably the heart language of these people.” (NOTE: On 11/08/00 God answered this prayer.)

6/10/96 NOTE: The RGs are another family whom we do not know.

“Gift from RG of $25”

7/7/96 “Given an air-conditioner and 2 ceiling fans from D&JM! It’s been hot so these were special gifts for specific needs.”

7/10/96 “Preaching engagement paid me $500 and reimbursement for cost of travel.”

8/11/96 “RD sent $200. A surprise gift from someone I’d not seen or heard from in 16 years!”

SUMMARY: Three quarters of the year was complete and we were still living on Florence Avenue. Many new faces, places and ways had been encountered. The children were healthy and my Mother had improved a good deal, though she was still ill. There was no new church begun, though we met regularly with the two families we knew when we arrived and we still had the hope of adding another family from outside Jellico.  It had been challenging, but we had survived. However, there was still that last quarter of the year, and it has its stories too.

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The Journey Begins: Jellico

6/13/2013

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PictureOld picture of a young coal miner.
Entries from my journals are in italics. Additional comments have been added for clarity in the form of NOTES. The facts have not been altered, though first names, initials, or pseudonyms are used instead of full names to protect the privacy of those involved. The amounts and quantities shown are actual.


12/15/95 We arrived in Jellico on the 13th. God provided a 3 bedroom rental house for $300 per month. The timing was, of course, perfect. DW worked hard and prepared all the water, electric, and telephone arrangements prior to our arrival. This was the first of God’s provisions. I’ve begun searching for work.

12/19/01 My first interview was today. Rumor is of a factory to open here soon, so I checked into it.  The manager offered me a supervisor position, but the job demanded I be on call 24/7. It was for the 3pm to 12 midnight shift and would keep me from prime family time hours during the week and perhaps weekends. I told the interviewer that I had children and could not commit to that schedule.

He clearly wanted someone he could train and depend upon for the long term. Believing that ministry will one day consume all my time, I told him I could not be counted on to be available over the long term.  So, I declined the offer, but left him my application for any lesser position that offered daytime hours. Having stood firm on principles of family-first and full disclosure, I lost the possibility of securing the highest paying job available in Jellico today, but I am not afraid. God is also firm on His principles.

12/95  After that interview God began a shower of blessings. Though we solicited none of them,  gifts were sent to us. These arrived during our first month in Jellico-- the month of December:
M&SB $100 
HL church $1000
J&DM $150
M&MA $50
KIM $200
E&FW $50
T&DH $205
B&DW $28
SR church gave a resettlement gift of $6300.
NC church – sent winter boots and clothes for the entire family. We don’t even know them!
Leaving Texas, many individuals offered us odds-n-ends for setting up.
D&JM–a ham

 12/30/95 NOTE: My Mother’s health condition was worse than we had discerned before leaving Africa.  She lived with chronic and excruciating pain. Doctors had not determined the cause or cure. Many times I slept in a chair by her bed to watch in case she woke in the night and needed assistance.  It was difficult for all of us, but especially for her.

For Christmas we were given two large boxes filled with new winter shoes and boots. I was given a winter underclothing. A church in NC heard of us and were moved by God to send these items!

Yesterday, we got a call from R&C E in Texas. They’d been moved to call and offer to send us some support. I explained our doctrinal stance might be different from theirs, because I wanted to be completely honest. They had no problems and will be sending the gifts.

God is daily confirming to me that He is near and aware and involved. Also, for the past two mornings I’ve felt compelled to lay prostrate before the Lord during my prayers as I pray for Mom (Her chronic pain.). Yesterday she said, ‘Steve, today I’ve had one of those rare days when I’ve felt really good.


12/31/95 $160 left on our pillows and refrigerator by D & CS after they left our house today. They promise to give regularly. 


Thus the year 1995 came to a close. So much had changed in 12 months: a baby had arrived, we'd moved around the globe, our mission in Africa had come to a halt, our mission in Appalachia had begun, and Mom had moved in. It was a year filled with a lot of stress. It was not one to live over, but it was a necessary transition. I suppose it was like that part of a woman's labor that doctors refer to as 'transition' -- painful, but necessary for the beginning of a new life. We'd felt the pain; we now waited to see what was about to be born.


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Muller's Call. Our Call?

6/12/2013

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Picture
In the months just prior to leaving Kenya, I had, almost by accident, been introduced to the autobiography of a man whose story influenced my life profoundly. He is perhaps my chief spiritual mentor though he lived a hundred years before I was born.

George Muller—was a great man of prayer. He operated an orphanage in the 1800s that was supplied solely by the provisions of God in answer to prayer. There was no solicitation, no advertising, no sharing of needs, no begging or pleading. There was quiet prayer and waiting. He wrote about his purpose in operating the orphanage’s funding in this atypical manner:

“The chief end being that the church of Christ at large might be benefited by seeing manifestly the hand of God stretched out on our behalf in the hour of need, in answer to prayer. Our desire, therefore, is not that we may be without trials of faith, but that the LORD graciously would be pleased to support us in the trial, that we may not dishonor Him by distrust. This way of living brings the LORD remarkably near. He is, as it were, morning by morning inspecting our stores, that accordingly He may send help.” (See footnote for quote source.)          

Mr. Muller’s trust in God for provisions was the primary avenue through which God demonstrated, for over 50 years, an eagerness to answer believing prayer. The testimony which resulted from Muller’s answered prayers was considered by Muller to be perhaps of greater importance than his ministry to the orphans. Since we first read his story in 1989, Donna and I have been “nudged” to follow his example.

Thus, grand as our Appalachian church planting dreams may have been, they rested on taller shoulders.   We felt God wished to work through us to deliver as a fresh testimony that He still hears and answers prayer.   

Serving as a living testimony to God’s readiness to hear prayer was our chief objective in coming to Appalachia. We moved toward that position only partially until in 1999 when we came under His wing fully at the advice of our four friends.

The journey ahead would be filled with tests and delights. At times we would be distraught and despair, yet at others we were delighted and astonished. Though it was not (and sometimes still is not) always easy, we managed to stay on the roller coaster. Only in recent years do we get a little giddy at the approach of a "drop-off".  PROVISIONS is a telling of the ups-n-downs of that story.

Taking our example from Muller, Donna and I determined never to solicit assistance, or inform others of our needs.  Our needs were kept secret; known only to God in the closet of prayer. This awareness of the purposeful secrecy of the needs of our family and ministry made way for the exceptional testimonies of God’s resulting answers. 

PROVISIONS  however, is not to become a model or recipe for others. It is not to be taken as normative practice for all Christians. In no way am I (or would Muller) suggest that others of you do as we have done. God provides for His people through wages for work, through fund raising efforts, through sharing etc. These are in no way inferior or ‘less spiritual’ than what PROVISIONS records. We believe God’s working in our life and ministry has been unique simply because He desires a unique testimony. Though unique, PROVISIONS is only one demonstration of God’s readiness to hear and respond to prayer. 

If there is a clear message; a clear model; an example to take; or a teaching from PROVISIONS for all Christians it is this: “Pray. God IS listening.”

PROVISIONS opens the door to the living room of our private ups and downs, our personal humanity. Such vulnerability is needed so that the workings of God may shine brightly against our doubts and personal weaknesses.  It demonstrates how God moves the tender hearts of His people--apart from well planned ad-campaigns, religious telemarketing, televangelist pleading, or even the casual mention of needs or “opportunities”. While it certainly shows that we should be praying, it also reminds us that we need to be listening. We are all His instruments: sometimes recipients, and sometimes channels of  provision.

What we detail in these entries is far, far, far from being a fund-raising method.  Our story is an illustration of how faithful God is to hear our prayers, and how He nudges us to action.  The focus is God’s faithfulness and activity in our midst today.

PROVISIONS exposes my family and I to both the accolades of those who see and believe as well as to the criticisms of those who doubt. Neither are accurate critiques. Again, the only proper response to the material is a focus upon and adoration of Jehovah Jireh.

Here, let me pause and take a deep breath as I release this material into your hands. These records have been held, until now, in private chambers. Yet, I am thrilled to share with you the things-- great and small, public and obscure-- which God has done. The entries I’ve selected are mostly about daily provisions, but also about personal and family issues and, near the end, about souls. It was necessary to offer entries describing our

Picture12/14/95 - The Ryder Truck, Our Suburban & Mom's Car.
personal doubts, fears, and questions so you might know the range and rhythm of our struggle to keep on believing.  May you find them human enough to see yourself yet divine enough to see Him. 

Here, in December of 1995, the story opens with us driving a Ryder truck into the small Appalachian community of Jellico, Tennessee where unemployment is high, friends are  few, the future is uncertain, but God has called. 


[1] George Muller: All Things are Possible by A.T. Pierson; published by Ambassador 

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The Florence Avenue House

6/10/2013

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PictureCaleb in the Ryder Truck we drove from Texas to Tennessee.
Our house on Florence Avenue sagged in the middle. Adequate for a start, it was a squeeze for the 7 of us. Dale, who’d initially invited us to work in Jellico had also found the Florence Avenue house. She had even made all the deposits and other arrangement for us to move in. Her help made for an easy transition. The Florence Avenue house would be our home for the next five years. 

My Mother took a bedroom downstairs and nearest the entry. Our rooms were upstairs in what was actually a converted attic. The ceiling was low. I had to stoop low to make it to our bedroom. Only down the center of the room could my 6'3" frame stand fully, but the low ceilings provided a wonder-world for the kids for whom it must have felt a perfect fit. The enclosed area over the porch, where Hannah slept most of the summer, was not insulated which made for a cool place in the hot months, but became too cold in the winter. During cold months all the kids slept in the space above the living room which was better insulated.  Donna and I had our own room in an attic room with a door that offered privacy, but it too was a squeeze. Our mattress lay directly on the floor since attaching the bed frames made the bed too tall. It was a tight, but cozy, fit.

Downstairs a kitchen, washroom, small sitting room, dining room,  and bedroom (for Mom) squeezed into about 800 square feet. A single bathroom had been added off the dining room. Likely, the house had not originally had indoor plumbing. It was near to Mom’s room however, and that was important. 

The backyard had a wild apple tree, which the kids loved. The front had just enough room to park our cars. This is where we began. It was God’s first provision for us, and we thanked Him. 

My intention was to find work locally. It shouldn’t have been a problem. I was articulate, honest, hard working, a quick learner, and good looking. (Okay, nix that last descriptive, though my wife thinks I’m handsome.) I figured, “Within 6 months I’ll be employed and up and running with the church planting”.  Soon, the title of the chapter God was writing became clear, “Overly Optimistic”. 

Appalachia was a low income, high unemployment area of the country even in a booming economy, and Jellico seemed at the epicenter. As a missionary, I had no training or experience for secular industry. I attempted several types of self-employment--often working at several of them simultaneously-- including multi-level marketing, sales, sign painting, book writing, carpentry, investing, agriculture and technical recruiting. I applied at the Rite Aid, the State Park, and Taylor’s machine shop, I even drove 60 miles to interview at a Wal-Mart distribution center. Many workdays were 16 and 18 hours and  often producing no net gain. Though we lived very frugally, only three times during those first 3 years did my income meet our expenses for that month.  As our savings dwindled stress grew. Often, I questioned the sanity (or insanity) of moving to Appalachia. 

My efforts at provision were taking the bulk of my time and energy. The dribble of them that remained was insufficient to carry out any of the dreams of church planting we had envisioned for the mountains. Something had to change, drastically and soon.

It did in late 1999. I was approached by a nearby University to work with students and the school’s local outreach program. I interviewed. It was an all consuming role meaning no time or energy for church planting. Scripture counseled me to see advice. How glad I am that I did.

I explained the entire scenario to four close friends. Two I phoned. The last two were husband and wife and our neighbors. Mike was first. He listened and slowly responded, “Steve, I don’t know that I could do this, but I think you ought to go on and do what you think God sent you up there to do. Just get busy with the church planting.” 

Wow! That was not what I’d expected. Stop working all together? Drop my only income producing efforts?  How would we get any supplies? Dizzying.

I thanked him and did what anyone would do, I sought a second opinion. Dwane, took my call, heard the whole story except for what Mike had advised, and you will not believe what he said. Almost word for word he responded, “Steve, I don’t know that I could do this, but I think you ought to go on and do what you think God sent you up there to do.” I thanked him and sat down to think. Instantly, I knew what to do next…seek a third opinion.

The Greeks, our neighbors, met with Donna and I at our house. We explained all and shared with them the advice Mike and Dwane had given us. What was their opinion? They, not to our surprise, but almost contrary to our hopes, agreed with the other two. So, Monday morning I walked in and submitted my two-week notice to the building contractor I was working for. He was stunned. When I tried to explain why I was leaving and what I would be doing. His face expressed his thoughts, “You are nuts.” 

 Again, I was reminded that since God expected the Jews to feed their work animals, it was reasonable to expect that He would provide for us, who spent our energies and time doing His work.

If lightening were to strike a spot once, you might think it a fluke or chance. If the same spot were struck twice, it might still be thought a coincidence. However, if the same spot were struck 100 or even 1000 times would you believe something besides luck was at play?

If Donna and I had received only one or only a few gifts in answer to prayers, it could be deemed that our gifts were merely the kind heartedness of a few friends, but we received hundreds of gifts-- many coming in the  exact amounts and times which we had presented to the LORD. 


Though each may be of small merit on its own, the collective weight of nearly $750,000.00 over 13 years is strong evidence that something special is happening.  


I have recorded many of those events so that you might have more reason to believe.
                                                                                                                                                                          --Stephen 
PictureThe view along I-75 near Jellico.
The facts however, are that God had in effect, been our Provider since our arrival to Jellico. All along, He had been sending surprise gifts, but we would now be trusting Him for every need. I had the peace that comes with doing the right thing, and yet, I felt a knot in my gut like I had strapped myself into a roller coaster and cresting the first long drop--the kind that makes your heart race and your stomach leap into your throat.

 


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    Husband to Donna.
    "Dad" to four sons.
    "Daddy" to one daughter. 
    "Babu" to Lathy-Bug & Jeda-Bear.  

    I like the solitude of mountains, the exotic danger of jungles, the power of rainstorms, and the first sip of hot coffee in the morning.

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